Why, yes. This is a post. No, it doesn't make any sense.

“The Vertically Ungifted, almost Blood-Colored Head Covering Device of which the word ‘Riding’ is being used to modify,
and the stupid little girl who wore it”


An adequately past era of time before this, in an equally adequately distant space, there (of which there means both here and the location of where the story will take place) existed one in which the term “Little Red Riding Hood” shall be implied to from now on. ‘Little Red Riding Hood’ coexisted with a maternal being of which she (the exact gender is unknown) has been conceived upon. The second being asked (the word force is heavily discouraged) ‘Little Red Riding Hood’ (LRRH from now on since the writer is too lazy) to distribute an indefinite amount of edible matter among other group of beings we shall call ‘relatives’. This group ‘relatives’ was once a huge battalion of elite soldiers who fought for the sake of ‘good’, hence the name ‘good guys’ in a past era of time, but of course, the name was pirated, especially by the Justice League (stupid Superman, Grr...). But due to various kinds of STDs and other such diseases like ebola, their numerical value has declined greatly, leaving only one. We shall refer to that being as ‘her’ or ‘grandma’. So ‘LRRH’ has been asked to share edible matter with ‘grandma’, or as we call it, bring food to her hermit for a grandmother.
‘LRRH’ had to navigate through a scattered area of leafy, barky, and bushy material to get to ‘grandma’s house’, or location. During the said navigational trek, ‘LRRH’ had a confidential meeting with a being calling himself (the exact gender is unknown) ‘Big Bad Wolf’ of which we shall refer to as ‘BBW’ (I said I hate typing).
During the exchange of auditory-sensible material, they exchanged about politics and love and life. As they continued in the said manner, they came upon the topic of ‘grandma’, in the middle of which ‘BBW’ spawned up an imaginary glowing light bulb over his head and thought of countering ‘LRRH’s’ plan by capturing ‘grandma’ and forcing her into his mouth. ‘BBW’ made ‘LRRH’ lose her way by conjuring a cleverly disguised visual disorder infliction device, obviously known to normal, ordinary people as a smoke bomb, and reached ‘grandma’ safely.
Upon reaching the oh-so-secret location and breaching the ‘relative’s’ security, he moved into the room classified as ‘bedroom’ without being seen. As he reached the said room, he was filled with a seemingly happy sensation as he found ‘grandma’ asleep but still wearing her very conservative gown (this is a children’s story). Another light bulb appeared and levitated above ‘BBW’s’ head. He mysteriously forced ‘grandma’ into his stomach without destroying the gown, or any other article of clothing for that matter (I said this was a children’s story).
After he finished covering himself with the gown and lying on where ‘grandma’ laid previously, immediately and purely coincidentally ‘LRRH’ entered the ‘bedroom’.
What transpired was another exchange of auditory-sensible material. ‘LRRH’ felt an awed feeling of an aww-like manner (the feeling when you want to say AWW....). She inquired of the reason why the visual orbs of ‘grandma’ were greatly disproportioned. ‘BBW’ then stated that it was for her to transmit visual images to her brain better. The same question was asked for the lobes that hung on ‘grandma’s’ sides. The same reply was wrought, though now about the ears, duh.
Yet when ‘LRRH’ asked for the reason why her ‘grandma’s’ dental protrusions were incredibly, shall we say, different, not to mention extremely putrid, ‘grandma’, or better yet, ‘BBW’, couldn’t help but express his desire for ‘LRRH’s’ uh, belongings and in short, eat her. ‘LRRH’ was flattered, though she too had an earlier prepared course-of-action.
She whipped up a 1-meter shotgun and shot the brains out of the wolf. She then got a knife and cut the dead wolf’s stomach and took her grandma out (of course with clothes, this really is a children’s story) and then put some stones on the wolf’s stomach. She then resurrected big bad wolf by wickedly dark witchcraft, dug a hole on the ground, buried the unconscious beast alive, leaving only the head, cut his cheeks with the same stupid knife, and left the stupid beast to go and stupidly die.
A few days later, she committed hardcore suicide.

THE END


MORAL OF THE STORY: Avoid, or in most cases, never approve the exchange of linguistic material realizable in the auditory sense with other beings that your knowledge of is less that what defines a friend. And don’t do drugs, or something.